Loving Across the Pacific Ocean

I was never a fan of long distance relationships. It was never for me, I thought. It was hard! You're not together, you'll have to deal with things on your own, you're alone most of the time, you go places and attend functions with no partner, you're basically single but not allowed to date anyone. That was my perspective on this type of relationship and I was completely not up for it.

When I graduated high school, I broke up with my then ex-boyfriend because we were going to study in different cities. I was going to stay in my dorm while he remained in Cavite. There was no bad blood - just the fact that many things may happen. Instead of hanging onto me and some promise, I chose to let go. I was young, I wanted to have fun and my mind was all focused in career. I was 16 - life was just about to begin.

Many years later I landed as a Crew Operator where I managed seafarers and their vessel assignments. During the latter part I was already single and some of my crew (who have also become friends) would ask me "why not date a seaman? Many here like you." But then I always responded with the same thing, "I don't want to be alone."

Being alone was hard for me. It was a personal issue, I suppose. I don't like being far away, being on my own. I depended a part of me on my partner and being in a long distance relationship was just the same as being single.

When I became Alex Polar Bear's Princess Honey Bear, I knew what I was up for.

I'm in the Philippines...
He's in Wisconsin!

It's not really that bad. If you're serious and you really love each other it's not really so bad. The distance and actual physical estrangement may cause some bumps along the road but you'll make it!

It will test your trust and patience. It's not just about chatting all the time and having video calls. It's also about trusting them during the time that you're not together. We trust each other so much that I never had any negative thoughts or doubts. I know him and his extreme loyalty. He knows me and my sincerity in my commitment. Not everyone are in the same frequency. Two couples in such a situation should always be open and honest.

Still feels alone sometimes. While you're friends are hugging their partners, posting their photos together and meeting up with you with their boyfriends or husbands, there you are with your beau who's only online. Are you up for that? I'm pretty much contented with our brief physical togetherness because we're working things out to be finally with each other forever. Are you having those plans too? Know where your stand is in your relationship because feeling alone can lead you to many things - neglecting your partner because you spend too much time with friends, doing things without their knowledge which may cause arguments, and worse - cheating. We then go back to my second point ~ trust and patience :3

Been there, done that... was bitter before LOL

Some may come across relationship comparisons. I tell stories and talk about our life. I talk with friends and discuss our relationships but some people come across unhealthy comparisons. Every relationship differs, so best never compare yours with others. Not only will you expect your partner who is far away to do too much, but you will also end up hurting them... and it goes both ways! Remember, it's harder to console through the distance. You can't just hug and make up.

I still have more thoughts in mind, I'd most likely write a complete article with separate ideas. Wait for them loves! This site is still under construction at the moment. For the mean time, lemme know your experiences and ideas!

xoxo

~ Honey Bear ~

Contact : kimistarr@photographer.net | Travel Blog : Kimi Goes Places | Official : KimiStarr.Net